I didn't know the Swiss had an army.
"Swiss Army Knife". It's not just a marketing slogan :)
it's actually a law (to my knowledge) that all men 18+ serve 2 years in the swiss army.
The army's slogan "To enforce neutrality"
And proof positive that a heavily armed nation is not necessarily an aggressor.
"To enforce neutrality"? Just make sure Zapp Brannigan doesn't hear about that.
"I hate these filthy neutrals Kif! With enemies you know where they stand but with neutrals? Who knows! It sickens me.
What makes a man turn neutral ... Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?
What makes Switzerland neutral? Perhaps "lust for gold" is right on the... money.
The reason for their nutrality is evident. The swiss are leprechauns.
No balls
Just make sure Zapp Brannigan doesn't hear about that.
I've often said that everything, EVERYTHING can be related to an episode of Futurama.
In fact, almost the entire male population of Switzerland is considered part of the Swiss military. All qualified males are part of Switzerland's army reserve.
the swiss are fine soldiers and their main mission is national defense. all adult males must serve in an active role for some time and all males up to a certain age that are not active are equipped to be activated on very short notice.
they also guard the pope at the vatican.
one reason the swiss have not been invaded during modern times is that their army is an integral part of a national defense plan that makes the risks of invading far outweigh the benefits.
i has been proven by history to be an effective strategy.
Thanks, I always thought of them as comical but now I understand they mean business.
That's the Swiss Guard. Different. They can be visually identified by subtle differences in uniform, oh and the swiss army doesn't employ the PIKE as an armament.
...all males up to a certain age that are not active are equipped to be activated on very short notice.
I just loved that! Beats being equipped with a swiss army knife any day. Who needs the Terminator when you have the Swiss National Service taking care of all your ... functions.
Reminds me of a driving holiday in France when we were near the Swiss border. In an effort to avoid toll roads into Geneva, I picked a small road generally going towards Lake Geneva - I knew if I came to the Lake, I would be in Switzerland.
Was expecting something to mark crossing one country to another. Nothing like it. A simple crossroads with an Inn in one corner had a tiny Swiss flag in the door. Not a soul in sight; no border control, not even the odd animal. That marked the border. I was never certain I was in a new country until I was in Geneva itself some 15 minutes later.
Easily one of the most welcoming, hospitable, friendly and organized nations on earth. They just don't make a song and dance about it! This article is typical of the region.
Raat - several thousand people commute every day between France (Annemasse & such) and Switzerland. There is a logistical and political reason to have a permeable border between Geneva and it's surroundings. I am from Geneva, and got so used to cross the border there that I got seriously reprimanded crossing the border coming from Italy into CH from the St Gothard. I was driving slowly and did not fully stop...
Tschreck - there are two main reasons (even stronger than the Swiss Army) why Switzerland was not invaded during the 2 wars: Landscape and Banks. Only a third of CH is "flat", and the borders can strategically be secured not to allow ground invasion.
They haven't been "invaded" because of their army? I'd rather say that they haven't been invaded because they kept their neutrality and the EU politics in Europe around Switzerland is really stable since WW2. It's not like somebody is rattling his sable around there.
any good swiss person knows these things Roberto..
:-)
i grew up near Arosa in GR
And, Switzerland is also a very convenient place in which to shift money and the ill gotten gains of war, in the same way one doesn't normally rob one's own bank - you rob everyone else's bank and stuff it all in your hidey-hole called Switzerland.
"It's not like somebody is rattling his sable around there."
That's "saber" .... altho' it does make an amusing visual to picture Swiss soldiers winging around dead weasels....
I just went out back and rattled my sable. He didn't like it too much.
Sure it was an accident. No one was thinking, look at that tasty little canton over there!
I'm sure there must be Swiss Army compass to go with their famous knives.
In their defense, a wise man once said there were three types of navigators: those that that have been lost, those that are lost and those that are going to get lost.
This was the first phase of their plan to conquer the world........in 10 years we will all be armed, building clocks, eating swiss cheese and chocolate.
Nut tu menshun ve-a veell ell be-a speekeeng leeke-a thees. Feer zee Sveess. Zeey ere-a cumeeng tu teke-a oofer zee vurld. Meesteke-a my heeeny. Furst Leeechtenstein, zeen vurld. Merk my vurds. Bork Bork Bork!
Um, I think you're talking like the SWEDISH chef.
This was the first phase of their plan to conquer the world........in 10 years we will all be armed, building clocks, eating swiss cheese and chocolate.
Where do I sign?
Um, I think you're talking like the SWEDISH chef.
Its all part of the plan.
wahaha, i thought of a hoax at first. Something like the Belgium thingy... :>
Well, I can see how the mistake would be made. On many fronts, they're pretty much indistinguishable. They probably could have marched half way through Austria without as much as a chocolate eating contest.
Cheney is already defending the Swiss Army's action ... He says to criticize it, would be to validate Al Qaeda's strategy
Peace
JTD
More examples of mistaken invasion (although no military here).
I bet this wasn't a mistake at all, they really were sending a message to the Lichtensteinian (????) government about having opinions and not being neutral and stuff. This was a warning shot across the bow.
The Swiss Army war plan:
Open up that knife and raise hell!
Or maybe the swiss soldiers will just write them a note with that little pen.
Or go around filing all their nails
Or tighten all the flat head screws in the region, confounding the enemy.
cut some really small peices of paper for propaganda notes
Open a bottle of wine
splinters shouldn't be a problem
It almost seems like a joke; Liechtenstein and Switzerland, two extremely peaceful states. I wonder what would have happened if the Swiss platoon had accidentally entered France?
**Insert French Jokes here***
again, luckily the swiss always come prepared with a corkscrew on their pocket knife.
they'd have a bottle of wine and some cheese, sit and listen patiently to some griping about americans, and go back home.
Heh - I was going to but then I decided it was too easy.
They would have surrendered? ;-)
Sorry. Couldn't resist.
Not that difficult to do ... some friends of mine on a trip to CERN accidentally went over the border. Unfortunately it wasn't quite as easy getting back ... took them almost two hours to get back without being spotted. I'm glad I got separated from them and headed back :)
Lick Ten Stein needs its own army. What if Bush invades them too?
tee hee
Bush loves invading countries.. that's my point. :)
PEACE first.
INVADING COUNTRIES AND STEALING THEIR RESOURCES second.
Wasn't there a movie about this? "The Mouse That Roared"?
That was a movie (from a book) about a tiny and impoverished nation in Europe deciding to declare war on the US and lose, so that they could tap into post-WWII Marshall Plan money.
My favorite part of the book and movie is that:
Expecting to be dealt a crushing defeat (and then rebuild itself through the largess that the United States bestows on its vanquished enemies such as in the Marshall Plan) the tiny Duchy instead defeats the United States, purely by accident, by capturing the Q-bomb, a prototype doomsday device that could destroy the world if triggered.
ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US
Nice. It's been a while since I've seen a good BASE reference.
If the Swiss ever take off every Zig, we'll see the jokes quiet down a bit. They have probably one of the most well equipped and active military on the planet. Perhaps third to US and Israel. The real reason they're never invaded is that they have no treaties, are strategically protected by geography (only an air strike would be effective, and they're ready for one), and their army is pretty bad ass. Plus every household has a weapon or two. They take care of themselves.
It was a completely understandable mistake. If I had a franc for every time I accidentally invaded Liechtenstein...
If I had a franc for every time I accidentally invaded Liechtenstein...
Ooooooh, that is a good one. <grin/>
At least this takes some of the attention off of the Polish armed forces (screen doors on submarines and everything)...
I hear they keep their amies in their sleevies...
this thread is a laugh-a-minute.
Obviously, this was a reconnoitering mission. The probe revealed an apathetic local militia. Even law enforcement did not resist. Liechtenstein had better learn Swiss ways. Italy had better watch their ass.
So it's not only their chesse that holes in it, it's their military strategy as well.
By the way the majority of Swiss cheese (I am Swiss.) does not have holes in it!
Funny stuff here. I'm moving to Switzerland in a few months. I love the place. Very weird, but they certainly have their sh*t together. I'm an American, currently coming to grips with the fact that the USA doesn't exist anymore, having been replaced by USA, Inc purveyors of lies and destruction. So, I'm going to the next best place, hopefully. Neutrality isn't spinelessness, it's just minding your own business.
Sorry, didn't mean to stop the good times. joke on.
happy yoddling :-)
robogobo:
Moving to Switzerland!? - TAKE ME WITH YOU!
How does an American get work over there???
simple. apply.
(sorry, could not resist)
The Liechtensteinians (?) probably confiscated those nifty knives as punishment.
Yes, in Switzerland each people over 18 (which went to army) have the army gun at home !
Moreover, you have to serve you country... if I'm right, it's 11 months once, or 2 weeks a year until you're some age, don't remember exactely which.
Perhaps the Swiss were defending their stores of wine? (they make great wine in Siwtzerland, most of which never makes it outside of the country)
tom-
don't be giving away the secrets.
If that were the case, wouldn't the Swiss have been more inclined to pad their borders with Italy in the Ticino valley? Or was this brief incursion just a distraction? Hmm...
Man, this is too cute.
Never trust an Army with a Cork-Screw on its Army Knife ;)
Au contraire!
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