Abuse Risk Seen Worse As Families Change

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NEW YORK — Six-year-old Oscar Jimenez Jr. was beaten to death in California, then buried under fertilizer and cement. Two-year-old Devon Shackleford was drowned in an Arizona swimming pool. Jayden Cangro, also 2, died after being thrown across a room in Utah.

In each case, as in many others every year, the alleged or convicted perpetrator had been the boyfriend of the child's mother — men thrust into father-like roles which they tragically failed to embrace.

Every case is different, every family is different. Some single mothers bring men into their lives who lovingly help raise children when the biological father is gone for good.

Nonetheless, many scholars and front-line caseworkers interviewed by The Associated Press see the abusive-boyfriend syndrome as part of a broader trend that deeply worries them. They note an ever-increasing share of America's children grow up in homes without both biological parents, and say the risk of child abuse is markedly higher in the nontraditional family structures.

"This is the dark underbelly of cohabitation," said Brad Wilcox, a sociology professor at the University of Virginia. "Cohabitation has become quite common, and most people think, 'What's the harm?' The harm is we're increasing a pattern of relationships that's not good for children."

The existing data on child abuse in America is patchwork, making it difficult to track national trends with precision. The most recent federal survey on child maltreatment tallies nearly 900,000 abuse incidents reported to state agencies in 2005, but it does not delve into how rates of abuse correlate with parents' marital status or the makeup of a child's household.

Similarly, data on the roughly 1,500 child-abuse fatalities that occur annually in the United States leaves unanswered questions. Many of those deaths result from parental neglect, rather than overt physical abuse. Of the 500 or so deaths caused by physical abuse, the federal statistics do not specify how many were caused by a stepparent or unmarried partner of the parent.

However, there are many other studies that, taken together, reinforce the concerns. Among the findings:

_Children living in households with unrelated adults are nearly 50 times as likely to die of inflicted injuries as children living with two biological parents, according to a study of Missouri abuse reports published in the journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics in 2005.

_Children living in stepfamilies or with single parents are at higher risk of physical or sexual assault than children living with two biological or adoptive parents, according to several studies co-authored by David Finkelhor, director of the University of New Hampshire's Crimes Against Children Research Center.

_Girls whose parents divorce are at significantly higher risk of sexual assault, whether they live with their mother or their father, according to research by Robin Wilson, a family law professor at Washington and Lee University.

"All the emphasis on family autonomy and privacy shields the families from investigators, so we don't respond until it's too late," Wilson said. "I hate the fact that something dangerous for children doesn't get responded to because we're afraid of judging someone's lifestyle."

Census data leaves no doubt that family patterns have changed dramatically in recent decades as cohabitation and single-parenthood became common. Thirty years ago, nearly 80 percent of America's children lived with both parents. Now, only two-thirds of them do. Of all families with children, nearly 29 percent are now one-parent families, up from 17 percent in 1977.

The net result is a sharp increase in households with a potential for instability, and the likelihood that adults and children will reside in them who have no biological tie to each other.

"I've seen many cases of physical and sexual abuse that come up with boyfriends, stepparents," said Eliana Gil, clinical director for the national abuse-prevention group Childhelp.

"It comes down to the fact they don't have a relationship established with these kids," she said. "Their primary interest is really the adult partner, and they may find themselves more irritated when there's a problem with the children."

That was the case with Jayden Cangro.

In July 2006, his mother's boyfriend, Phillip Guymon, hurled the 2-year-old nine feet across a room in Murray, Utah, because he balked at going to bed. The child died from his injuries.

Jayden's mother, Carly Moore, has undergone therapy since the killing. Yet she continues to second-guess herself about her two-year relationship with Guymon.

"There's so much guilt," she said in a telephone interview. "I never saw him hit my kids, ever. But he was gruff in his manner — there were signs that he wasn't most pleasant person for kids to be around."

Guymon has been sentenced to five years in prison for second-degree felony child abuse homicide. Moore thinks the penalty is far too light.

"It's a hard thing," she said, recalling Jayden's death. "You go off to work, you say, 'See you later,' and then everything's completely shattered in a split second."

Some women can't see the trouble even when it's right in front of them.

Jennifer Harvey of Springfield, Mo., acknowledged in court last summer that she continued to date a man for two months after becoming suspicious that he had killed her 18-month-old son, Gavin.

"I was in denial," said Harvey, who was placed on five years' probation for not acting on her suspicions. The boyfriend, Joseph Haslett, was sentenced to life in prison for suffocating the toddler with a headlock.

The slaying of toddler Devon Shackleford in 2004 was premeditated.

Derek Chappell, who was sentenced to death this month, considered Devon an obstacle to an on-again, off-again relationship with the boy's mother, and drowned him in an apartment complex's swimming pool in Mesa, Ariz.

The mother, Kristal Frank, has created a Web site in memory of her son, full of reminiscences and snapshots. Chappell is referred to only as "that inhumane thing."

Such cases trigger a visceral reaction, but there are no simple solutions. Some of the worst cases of child abuse involve biological parents, and examples abound of children thriving in nontraditional households

"There's no going back to the past," said Washington and Lee's Robin Wilson. "We don't tell people who they can cohabit with. We don't tell them they can't have children out of wedlock."

There are, of course, some initiatives aimed at reducing the percentage of children raised by single parents. That's one of the goals of the Bush administration's Healthy Marriage Initiative.

"The risk (of abuse) to children outside a two-parent household is greater," said Susan Orr, one of the top child-welfare specialists in the Department of Health and Human Services. "Does that mean all single parents abuse their children? Of course not. But the risk is certainly there, and it's useful to know that."

As with many local programs, the federal effort encourages single parents to at least consider marriage, while other programs focus on broadening the support network for single parents. One long-standing initiative, the Nurse-Family Partnership, has lowered abuse rates by arranging for nurses to visit low-income, first-time mothers throughout their pregnancy and after their child is born.

Many social workers say the emphasis should be on nurturing healthy relationships, whether or not the parent is married.

"The primary thing is to have adults around who care about these kids, whatever shape it takes," said Zeinab Chahine, who was a New York City child-protection caseworker and administrator for 22 years before taking a high-level job in July with Casey Family Programs.

Chahine said caseworkers need to learn as much as possible, in a nonconfrontational manner, about the personal dynamics in at-risk households. Is there an unmarried partner who spends time there, or a newly arrived stepparent? Does that person care about the children, or consider them a nuisance? Is a criminal background check warranted?

"We start from perspective that the mom is as concerned about her kids as we are," Chahine said. "We can try to help her see the need for us to look into the situation."

Judith Schagrin, a Baltimore-based social worker engaged in child welfare for 24 years, said live-in boyfriends can be valuable resources for a single mother and her children. Some even have been awarded custody of children as an alternative to foster care while the mother is in jail.

"We look at the relationship the kid has with whomever is around — is it supportive or destructive?" Schagrin said. "Does the mother have a long-term, stable relationship with this individual, or does she have rotating list of partners coming in and out?"

In the real world, however, learning crucial details about a potentially fragile family is not easy.

"The field struggles with the balance between intrusion in private matters and awareness of significant risks to the child," said Fred Wulczyn, a research fellow at the University of Chicago's Chapin Hall Center for Children.

"With a social worker who's in the house on a once-a-month basis, how good do we expect our diagnostics to be?" Wulczyn asked. "Achieving the right balance, so you never have to ponder 'What if?' — that's hard to do."

The sensitivity of probing into private lives is one of many problems underlying the lack of definitive national data that correlates child abuse with parents' marital status and household makeup. Some conservative commentators say "political correctness" is partly to blame — namely a reluctance to press for data that might reflect negatively on single motherhood.

Another problem is lack of thoroughness and consistency among the states as they forward abuse reports to federal agencies. Differing definitions of "household" and varying efforts to ascertain marital status result in a statistical "hodgepodge," according to Elliott Smith, who oversees a national archive of child-abuse research at Cornell University.

Among child-welfare specialists, there is hope that the statistical gaps will be filled by a comprehensive federal survey, the National Incidence Study, that will be completed next year.

The previous version of the study, released in 1996, concluded that children of single parents had a 77 percent greater risk of being harmed by physical abuse than children living with both parents. But the new version will delve much deeper into the specifics of family structure and cohabitation, according to project director Andrea Sedlak.

"We can ask the questions," Sedlak said. "But it's hard to look at cohabiting. It could well be there will be too much missing data to make definitive statements."

Long term, many child-welfare advocates say economic and social changes are needed, so day-care options improve and young men in poor communities have job prospects that make marriage seem more feasible. There's also agreement that many adults in high-risk households need better parenting skills — whether it's the harried young mothers often guilty of harmful neglect or the boyfriends and stepfathers often responsible for physical abuse.

"These boyfriends increasingly have been raised without fathers and been abused themselves," said Patrick Fagan, a family-policy specialist with the conservative Family Research Council. "Among the inner-city poor, the turnover of male partners is high. Where's a boy getting the model of what a father is like?"

Oscar Jimenez Jr., the San Jose, Calif., boy found buried under cement and fertilizer, did have a biological father who was devoted to him. But the father, Oscar Sr., separated from Oscar Jr.'s mother in 2002 and was prevented from seeing his son in the weeks before the boy's death in February, allegedly from a beating by live-in boyfriend and ex-convict Samuel Corona.

The mother, Kathyrn Jimenez, says she, like her son, was abused by Corona, yet she has pleaded guilty to three felony charges for assisting him — driving with him from San Jose to Phoenix to hide her son's remains, then keeping quiet about the killing for months.

Kathryn Jimenez was in custody when Oscar Jr.'s funeral took place Sept. 29. She didn't hear the plea of a longtime family friend.

"Listen carefully to the message," Olessia Silva said at the service. "To all the mothers in this world who may find themselves in a difficult situation or harmful relationship: know that there is always, always someone willing to help if you would just reach out."

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1.8
{"commentId":1194162,"authorDomain":"nimblesymbol"}

After my parents divorced, when I was five years old, my mother's new boyfriend (fresh out of vietnam), moved in with us. When my mother was out of the house and Dallas and I were alone, he would beat the crap out of me for some perceived 'slight' to him. I knew even at five years of age that Dallas was crazy. He would tell me afterwords that If I ever told my mother about it, he would drive a tank through my room while I was asleep, and turn me into a bloody red dot on the ground. After he and my mother broke up, I told her about the abuse. She told me that I probably deserved it. It opened a rift between her and I that has never been bridged. I think that Dallas hated seeing the product, me, of a relationship my mother had previous to theirs. But then again, he was pretty screwed up.

{"commentId":1194162,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"nimblesymbol"}
  • 10 votes
Reply#1 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 2:06 PM EST
{"commentId":1194279,"authorDomain":"PamelaDrew"}

That's unforgivable, no child should ever be abused and no mother should be able to look past the harm inflicted on her child. Some people just aren't cut out to be parents. Even when you come from one of those situations, it doesn't ruin your chance to be a loving parent. We all carry the issues of the adults in our young lives but we can be whatever kind of adults we choose. When I was a kid I made a long list of promises to myself about what I would or wouldn't do if I had kids of my own. They're all grown now and keeping the promises made their lives a world away from what mine was and maybe even better because I tried harder.

Now for this inb the article, just a bunch of BS to me in a culture with non stop violence in media, wages that destroy the ability of workers to survive, criminalization of drugs that makes single parent households out of so many of the poorest who may be guilty of nothing more than preferring a bit of weed to booze. This is a function of a Nation that treats the bulk of its people like %$#@ and the disrespect for basic human dignity creates the conditions, not the lack of a marriage license.

{"commentId":1194279,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"PamelaDrew"}
  • 5 votes
#1.1 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 3:14 PM EST
{"commentId":1194969,"authorDomain":"BeneluxBandit"}
BanditDeleted
{"commentId":1195307,"authorDomain":"chasencash"}

No 5 year old deserves that. It is a good thing to put distance between you and your mother. It is one thing not to know what happened but once aware, it is completely unforgiveable to excuse such a thing.

{"commentId":1195307,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"chasencash"}
  • 1 vote
#1.3 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 11:13 PM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1194604,"authorDomain":"ezeques"}

I would like to see the evidence that there is more of this going on now than ever throughout history. I have a theory that we just have a different press and mass media that has incentive to sensationalize these things. Reading less publicized history from past ages leads me to believe otherwise.

{"commentId":1194604,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"ezeques"}
  • 2 votes
Reply#2 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 5:42 PM EST
{"commentId":1194697,"authorDomain":"sampackard"}

Just because there is a correlation between non-biological parenting and child abuse, doesn't mean that one causes the other.

"Derek Chappell, who was sentenced to death this month, considered Devon an obstacle to an on-again, off-again relationship with the boy's mother, and drowned him in an apartment complex's swimming pool in Mesa, Ariz."

The situation depicted in the above quotation is not a result of Chappell being unrelated to the child, but of Chappell being nutso.

{"commentId":1194697,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"sampackard"}
  • 1 vote
Reply#3 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 6:11 PM EST
{"commentId":1194953,"authorDomain":"dchunny614"}

Stories like this are the reasons why I try so desperately to make my relationship with my boyfriend work. We recently had our first child in July and I want him to be raised by his biological parents. I was not raised with my father in the home, but luckily my stepfather was never abusive to me. With all of the stories of physical, mental, and sexual abuse happening to children nowadays, I cannot trust anyone. He does not even go to daycare for fear that someone will harm him. I love my child too much to place his life in the hands of a person who has no personal ties to him. I do not want him harmed and I do not want to have to kill someone if they harm him so I just avoid the situation.

{"commentId":1194953,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"dchunny614"}
  • 1 vote
Reply#4 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 8:07 PM EST
{"commentId":1194999,"authorDomain":"isaacs"}

I think the real danger, which was outlined in the story, is that children are increasingly being taken care of by people whose relationship to them consists of them being an impediment to what the caretaker wants, such as increased time with the mother, etc. That's the danger in this: allowing someone to care for a child when it isn't in their best interest for the child to be around. You're placing children into the hands of people who would rather they not be around and that makes it much easier for these kinds of "incidents" to happen.

{"commentId":1194999,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"isaacs"}
  • 4 votes
Reply#5 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 8:36 PM EST
{"commentId":1195002,"authorDomain":"dalma-1"}

It seems to me we are in a state of denial from the word go !!
People will defend the wicked till the cows come home - if there is some reward at the end of the rainbow ! Be it fiscal, emotional or dirt-bottom SEX,the vast majority of people will move heaven and earth to worship their basic instincts.
All wars,particularly the Iraq and Vietnam fiasco have delivered enormous amount of flotsam and human jetsam who are victims of PTSD and substance abuse. Desert storm, Timor, Afghanistan etc have inexorably increased the numbers - to where Veterans Affair's have admitted over 450,000 life-long casualties and increasing by the month. One doesn't have to be a rocket scientist to multiply the civilian casualties - parents, siblings, families who live with the onerous burden.
Inevitably, the burden will develop to where the invisible cost will surpass the actual cost of the military incursion. VA access's it a $600 billion so far. It wont end there because their off-springs will most certainly adopt their parents life long habits of alcohol and substance abuse, turn on their future children and the story becomes increasing morbid. Crime, domestic violence, incest whatever begets the problem.
Solution ? Education. Become informed so you can deal with the situation, avoid issues and make an educated guess to forestall any situation. The Net is the greatest hive of information - right here in your own home - use it wisely for your own good, and the welfare of the people you hold dearly.
Ciao

{"commentId":1195002,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"dalma-1"}
    Reply#6 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 8:36 PM EST
    {"commentId":1195071,"authorDomain":"isaacs"}

    Are you okay?

    {"commentId":1195071,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"isaacs"}
    • 3 votes
    #6.1 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 9:12 PM EST
    Reply
    {"commentId":1195061,"authorDomain":"ekornmeyer"}

    How does someone only get 5 years of prison for hurling a kid across a room and killing him... wow.

    {"commentId":1195061,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"ekornmeyer"}
    • 5 votes
    Reply#7 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 9:07 PM EST
    {"commentId":1195236,"authorDomain":"dad-2"}

    I see one statement missing, was the child's biological father excluded from these children's lives? My fight for 6 years ended this past week. My children have asked for 6 years to be ignored by the courts to see dad. This Tuesday, they got their wish I got equal custody.

    When we see the courts exclude biological fathers from children's lives, we see many adverse stories develop. Most deaths of children we see published, expecually very young ones, have the mother held in jail. The father is not charged. Sad to say this is to blame for two reasons. One the father may not be active by choice which is wrong, More likely the father has been excluded from the child's life by the courts and vindictive mothers.

    "Some conservative commentators say "political correctness" is partly to blame — namely a reluctance to press for data that might reflect negatively on single motherhood. " Well, the data does exist and the writer of this story didn't do his homework. Sad to say you only find what you want to find. Check out and you can find all the statistics you care to. It will make you sick.

    When judges drag men through courts who fight to see their children for years only to beat them financially by incentives from the federal government with kickbacks of 66 cents for every dollar the father pays in child support, we only see a cash issue for the counties. The care of a child has no value as long as the Federal Government gives incentives to take children from fathers. Our government has lost focus and it's time for a change. Yes, when I pay child-support you pay 66 cents in matching funds which is funneled into judge's pensions.

    Well single parents do hurt our children, maybe it's time to rebuild marriages in our country and take away the incentive to divorce. Of which, 90% of the divorces are initiated by women. And this story is about women with children without their biological father. Period

    Save the American Family and you save the children

    {"commentId":1195236,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"dad-2"}
    • 3 votes
    Reply#8 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 10:18 PM EST
    {"commentId":1195247,"authorDomain":"drjenn"}

    The November 17, 2007 Associated Press Article, Abuse Risk Seen Worse as Families Change details the deaths of several little boys at the hands of their mothers' boyfriends and leads to a discussion about the increased risk for harm that children face when their parents are not married. President Bush's Marriage Initiative is cited as a federal policy that can reduce the risk to children by increasing marriage among low income families. However, it is a grave error to believe that child abuse is bound by marital or socioeconomic status. The ugly fact is that men, married or not, do not like children – or more specifically, the work of children. I detail in my book "Men Don't Like Kids! 5 Ugly Facts About Human Behavior" – the research that shows that women are responsible for the lion's share of the work or parenting, regardless of marital status, education, employment, or other demands on their time. Research shows that men are aware of the overwhelming nature of child care, so they take refuge in the role of protector and provider, and stay clear of direct parenting. It is easy to draw the conclusion from research that this lack of shared responsibility for children is also a contributor to the lack of relationship stability among parents. Rather than focusing on social class or marital status in the search for the solution to protection for children, social science theory points to the importance of fathers providing direct child care for their children. This can be accomplished within many social and economic contexts and would also enhance the mental health of the mothers, which would have an overall positive impact for everyone. Dr. Jennifer Rounds-Bryant, author Men Don't Like Kids! 5 Ugly Facts About Human Behavior (www.5uglyfacts.com)

    {"commentId":1195247,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"drjenn"}
    • 1 vote
    Reply#9 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 10:27 PM EST
    {"commentId":1195350,"authorDomain":"dad-2"}

    Dr Jennifers-Bryant ,

    Well I got a question are you a member of NOW? Do you allow your ex to be in your children's lives? Have you used the system to exclude your children's or other women's child from their fathers. Are you the problem that is missing from this story. I believe so for I am making an assumption you are divorced here. Please forgive me if I'm incorrect on this oversight. The question is also do you have children?

    Your attitude is purely vindictive and catigorizing every father that calls me wants to be active. All data clearly shows that children with both biological parents in their lives, whether divorced or not, shows these children develop more stable lives. Statistics also show that when a father shows true parental love, divorced or not, to their children, these children have better relationships with the opposite sex when they grow older and learn trust for the opposite sex. It's when a child is kept secluded from one parent that distrust for others develop.

    Tell us Dr Jennifers-Bryant, was your father present in your life? Was your father kept from actively pursuing a relationship with you? Does this book you wrote actually tell of your anger of a missing father?

    Well I've gotten numerous comments from teachers and counselors that even though my children are in the biggest divorce in Ohio, they are doing fabulous. Maybe, you better re-evaluate your statistics and get over what might be, "your own personal anger" so your own children don't suffer.

    Chris Tock
    DADS Ohio

    {"commentId":1195350,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"dad-2"}
    • 1 vote
    #9.1 - Sat Nov 17, 2007 11:40 PM EST
    {"commentId":1195558,"authorDomain":"melonhead"}

    Well, well, each of you have your agendas. Speaking as a divorced mom, I cam tell you some of us divorce in order to raise our children. The first few years of divorce can be ugly if parents are preoccupied with settling scores. Emotions run high. My experience is that eventually a "cold peace" is possible. Children are harmed most the they are used as footballs by quarrelling parents, whether they are married, unmarried, or divorced. The most important thing a parent can do is to never invalidate the child's feelings toward the other parent. The issues is not necessarily time or money spent. Better to stop fighting and get less than what you want than to spend your child's fleeting years embattled. What a waste.

    {"commentId":1195558,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"melonhead"}
    • 1 vote
    #9.2 - Sun Nov 18, 2007 2:42 AM EST
    Reply
    {"commentId":1195601,"authorDomain":"kai"}

    People that hurt children should get the most severe, long, and painful punishment imaginable. Its absolutely heartbreaking when innocent kids are the victims.

    Those monsters should be released in an arena to the waiting public who is armed with thumbtacks, 2x4's, sulfuric acid, scissors, and hammers. THAT'S justice.

    {"commentId":1195601,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"kai"}
    • 2 votes
    Reply#10 - Sun Nov 18, 2007 4:18 AM EST
    {"commentId":1197168,"authorDomain":"drjenn"}

    Mr. Tock, first let me say that I come in peace. Secondly, I believe that if you had read to the bottom of my message, you would have noticed that our comments were complimentary. Therefore, I repeat below the last several lines of my comment:

    "Rather than focusing on social class or marital status in the search for the solution to protection for children, social science theory points to the importance of fathers providing direct child care for their children. This can be accomplished within many social and economic contexts and would also enhance the mental health of the mothers, which would have an overall positive impact for everyone."

    I hope the repetition makes it easier to see that the primary idea of my comment is that children need the direct participation of their fathers in their care-taking, regardless of socioeconomic or marital status.

    Dr. Rounds-Bryant
    www.5uglyfacts.com

    {"commentId":1197168,"threadId":"177357","contentId":"1104365","authorDomain":"drjenn"}
    • 1 vote
    Reply#11 - Sun Nov 18, 2007 8:10 PM EST
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