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Malls in the Northeast cut hours or closed entirely Wednesday as the region was hit by a winter storm.
For two months this holiday season, an empty jewelry store in midtown Manhattan has been magically transformed into a toy train shop, complete with a Christmas tree and electric engines chugging along miniature tracks.
Statistics tell us that there are 0.2 malls for every 1,000 people in the United States; that’s equivalent to the per-capita numbers for restaurants, which must mean that shopping has become as vital as eating to Americans.
Community college classes in the old mall movie theater. A DMV office across from the Starbucks. Maybe a local library between the Victoria's Secret and the Gap.
The Next Asia Is Africa: Inside the Continent's Rapid Economic Growth ~~~ Hitting the MallThe new mall culture in Zambia's capital, which I've watched expand almost exponentially in visits over the last three years, is booming all over Africa, in places like Accra and Dakar, Windhoek and Gaborone, Nairobi and Maputo. Driving it are young people
Plant City to reconsider tattoo, body-piercing studio banTimes and attitudes are changing, say city officials, who are reconsidering the city's longtime ban on tattoo and body-piercing studios. City Attorney Ken Buchman said the city's exclusion of such businesses might not be able to withstand a constitutional challenge.
Next thing, before anyone knew what was going on, quintillions of inhabitants from other shelves close by and far away came rushing to this particular shelf: Apparently, word had gotten out quickly about the visitor from another world and the cluster that kept spawning playthings …
Scratching the side of his face, Yale Nelson wondered: "What in the name of the Lord are they doing now? This place makes absolutely no sense to me.
Then something really strange happened, many of the level-26 inhabitants ran over to one of the shelf's walls and started ripping long rectangular pieces off the surface: This they did many thousands of times.
Then as Yale Nelson sneered the audience and pointed his finger right at the levelkeeper, his jaw dropped wide open at the chaos brewing at the cluster: "I don't believe this is happening! It can't be? No... I must be seeing things? There is absolutely no way that... that....
While Yale Nelson continued to mock the levelkeeper and the crowd angrily shouted, something extraordinary happened: The cluster on level-26 began to flourish once again with more brilliant points of light.
The cluster on level-26 was a beautiful cornucopia to behold. Thin long shoots sprang up from the shelf's horizontal surface. Furthermore, these shoots merged together into one gigantic bulge with a very wide girth.
"You.... HAH HAH HAH! You.... HAH HAH HAH.... You, Zetrias.... HAH HAH HAH! You, ZETRRIAASSS.... HAH HAH HAH, OH, LORD! You, ZETRIAS.... Are INSANE! HAH HAH HAH!" said Yale Nelson as he continued to roll around on his back.
Waving his hands through the air as though he was trying to levitate an object, Yale Nelson questioned: "How could I have possibly killed an object that wasn't alive in the first place, huh? Answer that question, you horde of lascivious fanatics! Yeah, come on.
"You are a murderer!" the levelkeeper shouted like a legion of blown trumpets. Then, the whole assembly of inhabitants from level-26 rushed in to catch a glimpse of what had happened.
At this point in time, all the inhabitants on level-26 turned to see what the commotion was about: Yale Nelson angrily banged on the inner surface of the bubble. Furthermore, he even tried using his fingers to pop it; but it availed him nothing. "It's no use, young man.
"Okay, since the 777 billion year old prophecy has been fulfilled, is there anyway I can get out of this cumbersome bubble?" Yale Nelson asked the levelkeeper.
After about 360 seconds of pure pleasure, the levelkeeper pulled his penis out of the sex toy and remarked: "I wouldn't trade living in this world for anything else there is; not even for a whole world to myself. This place is simply superb and magnificently opulent.
"Oh, yeah, before I forget: Just exactly how many weeks and months do you have in a year?" Yale Nelson blurted out.
"There are 676,676 seconds in a minute? That's insane!" Yale Nelson squabbled. "Hey, what can I say, we live in a world where we have plenty of time to indulge ourselves in endless and relentless pleasures!" said the levelkeeper.
Clearing his throat a bit, Yale Nelson slightly interrupted the grand celebration by asking the levelkeeper a question: "Sir, if there are 676 hours in a day, how many minutes are there in an hour and how many seconds in a minute?" Wherefore, the levelkeeper resumed his original …
"WHAT! You've got to be kidding me? That many years at that astonishing rate would come out to about 790.209 trillion days or 534.181284 quadrillion hours! That's incredible! Your civilization has got to be the longest one there is anywhere!" Yale Nelson flabbergasted.
Despite the intense arousal that Yale Nelson felt, he finally came to his senses and yanked the endlessly-fluctuating contraption off his penis and held it up in his left hand.
Straightening out the flexibly-long cylinder-like contraptions, the three women inserted them inside their own vaginal holes; and the devices swung around inside them madly and almost out of control: Lascivious cries echoed from their wobbling throats; and soon, the rest of the c …
The vaginal sex toy continued to rotate, wiggle, jiggle, prance, dance, hop, skip, and jump over and around Yale Nelson's penis like a wild jackrabbit hammered by the fixation of one million milligrams of high-octane estrogen.
Holding the very bright-colored object inside his hands, Yale Nelson said, "From the shape of the orifice, it looks to me like it's some sort of vaginal sex toy?" "Yes," the levelkeeper answered, "Now, try it on for size.
"So are you going to answer his question or not?" said another of the four nude women. Still pinching his nose slightly, Yale Nelson growled, "Who the heck is he that I should have to answer to him!" "He's the levelkeeper for the twenty-sixth level.
"Alright! Alright! I'll tell you, but let me out of this bubble first! Alright?" Yale Nelson blared to the naked man standing on the twenty-sixth level of a shelf. Nevertheless.
Suddenly as Yale Nelson approached the twenty-sixth level of one shelf, a nude man held up his left hand and unleashed a pristine bubble at him. Immediately on contact, the bubble rapidly expanded and engulfed Yale inside like a transparent cocoon.
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